Keep in touch with your romantic side by reading classic romantic novel books. Try reading the books I listed below to help you maintain an intense relationship and keep the spark alive. Sometimes, being together is not just all about sex, but how well you get along and how much you are willing to sacrifice for your loved one and how long you will be willing to understand and accept the mistakes made. Be inspired and stay in love as you take time to browse the books I recommend worth reading.
Some millennials and adults are choosing to leave the churches they grew up in due to various reasons, like not liking the system, the introduction of new knowledge, confused about the existence of God, and more. According to the Pew study, nearly 23% of America’s adult population call themselves “nones,” or no faith affiliation. It is saddening that these people have chosen to leave their place of worship that first introduced to them the idea of God and wander to the unknown looking for something they don’t exactly know.
“However prevalent the superficial motives for being an atheist, there still remain in many instances the deep and disturbing psychological sources as well,” writes Paul C. Vitz, PhD.
I know you think why on earth you would read a book when there are so many things to do to get facts and information. There are news and YouTube videos. If some say for entertainment, there are videogames and smartphones. If the reason is for building imagination, there is Netflix and all sorts of visual representation of fantasy and science fiction. So why would you read a book? Well, let me answer that.
The Most Significant Reasons Why
- Food For The Brain – Reading a book creates a world where you emerge yourself into. That is because the brain tries so hard to use its energy in providing you a better picture of your imagination. The truth is, reading consumes a lot of your energy trying to process your senses and emotions at the same time. No, it is not a bad thing. It is entirely the opposite of that. Reading is changing the brain structure by improving cognitive processes and making you more empathetic. Ken Pugh, PhD, says that “parts of the brain that have evolved for other functions—such as vision, language, and associative learning—connect in a specific neural circuit for reading, which is very challenging.”
- It Becomes An Attraction – Reading widens your knowledge that creates a more elaborate expression, emotion, and opinion that you can share to others. “Reading helps us to take the perspective of different characters we normally wouldn’t interact with, and to give us a sense of their psychological experiences and how they interact with other people and situations,” says Maria Eugenia Panero, PhD, a research associate at the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence. It becomes a tool that empowers you to participate in an exciting conversation and has something to say to the subject. The particular setup is making you attractive because of the knowledge you are sharing in a discussion on an argument. In this case, you become more composed and confident about yourself, which adds an edge for an attractive personality.
- Helps Improve Vocabulary – Reading does not guarantee a solution to your communication problem. However, it significantly expands your vocabulary that can later help you in expressing your thoughts and ideas. The more you indulge yourself into reading; you get the chance to improve your speech level as well.
- Meeting Interesting People – Since reading gives you the knowledge, it becomes easy for you to join in a conversation. That is because you already have something to share with people. With that, you become open to the opinions of others. You can have a chance to document yourself in engaging in different subjects and participate in actual interaction. This way, you get to be in contact with different people which you can learn something from them as well.
- Allow You To Become Who You Are – I know it sounds philosophical, but it is the truth. Books open new worlds where imagination and self-awareness meet. There is also a tendency that books can improve your skills when you learn and improve your mind. That is the reason why reading becomes a stage of building one’s self. It allows you to have an idea of how you should create your personality.
- It Is Fun And Relaxing – Yes, reading is fun and relaxing. .”It really doesn’t matter what book you read, by losing yourself in a thoroughly engrossing book, you can escape from the worries and stresses of the everyday world and spend a while exploring the domain of the author’s imagination. This is more than merely a distraction but an active engaging of the imagination, as the words on the printed page stimulate your creativity and cause you to enter what is essentially an altered state of consciousness,” as explained by Dr. David Lewis, a neuropsychologist at Mindlab International at Sussex. There are lots of genres to choose from authors all over the world. The extraordinary thing about it is you control the elements and stories in it by creating your picture in your head. You can become as engaged as you want.
I only listed some of the benefits, but I can guarantee that there’s a lot more which you can give credit to reading. So, why not start reading now?
If you are a man struggling between your relationship and life purpose, choose the latter. Your purpose should always come first before your romantic relationship. Think about it. If a woman picks you despite the many great and more excellent men in her life, be thankful. That is because there is something she sees in you that she can’t find in them. It is something about your purpose and direction in your life that made her want you.
The Way Of The Superior Man By David Deida
If you are not familiar with the book, allow me to share its concept. One thing about it that men should take note is that not all women are the same. Men might think that women are more into physical attraction, hardworking men, honest individuals, or to say at least. A lot of them want a man that knows his purpose. You see, the problem with the most relationship does not originate by accident. All of the issues around the romantic relationship happen because of the choices someone is doing. And one of those is choosing a relationship over a purpose.
“Focusing only on gender differences when dealing with our partners tends to oversimplify things and exaggerate the truth, leading to less, not more, understanding of one another,” writes Gwendolyn Seidman, Ph.D.
I get that. When a man is in a relationship, he values his partner. There is this eagerness of wanting to give her everything even if she is not asking for it. However, that becomes one of the mistakes he does. Imagine you are a fun and exciting person. Your woman loves you because you are outgoing, adventurous, and a free-spirit. With that, she decides to go on a journey with you because she knows it will be fun to be around a person like you. But instead of allowing her to come on a journey with you, you prioritized her. You begin choosing the relationship over the kind of life you desire because you want to be with her. You become unaware that the reason why she is into you is because of your value to yourself.
The book also points out the concept of a man’s responsibility for the course of the relationship. There are the basics of decision-making. Sometimes, even the stupid ones appear included as well. When a man puts too much of his everything for the woman she loves, it is the woman’s nature to leave him. With that, two persons are getting dragged in an unfortunate situation. But only one of them suffers the judgment – and that is the woman. You see, people do not understand that human nature is so complicated that everyone gets to feel confused about everything.
“Owning what’s yours—mistakes and blunders included—is a sign of maturity, but owning everybody else’s mistakes and blunders, not to mention tasks, duties, and emotions, is a sign of over-responsibility,” writes Dr. Ellen Hendriksen, PhD.
There are so many examples in the book where it shows the same messages. But throughout the whole read, it ends up in a valuable lesson. It is all about the man’s attitude of improving himself and his relationship. That is through the process of gathering experience, caring more for his significant other, and understanding female psychology. I am not saying that all burdens should go to a man’s side. But when you think about it, the betterment of the relationship supports reciprocated acts that start from the guy.
“When we take these steps of interrupting harmful behaviors in our relationship and identifying patterns from our past, we start a journey of self-discovery that can be both deeply painful and richly rewarding,” writes Lisa Firestone, Ph.D.
You are probably reading this article because you already read the first part. It is where I shared a couple of books from Tim Ferris, Nick Winter, Neil Pasricha, and Stephen Covey. So now, I will try and add some books that will complete the list. Same as the last, these are the books that may or may not have an accurate representation of life, but these prove to make some points as well. So with that, here are the additional books that can change someone’s life.
Pragmatic Thinking And Learning (Andy Hunt) – I know a lot of people will agree to me that this is one of the best productivity books out there. One of its useful tidbits is the creation of habit where one should capture insight 24/7. It creates a direct inspiration to always having a way of getting ideas and information. There is an emphasis on taking notes often, regardless of what a person is doing. The book also has some tips on how to work on proper note-taking as well as constructing ideas correctly. “The mind screams that this is inconsistent. It’s not. Commitment is not about never failing, but about getting back up each time you do. And then committing again,” writes Steven C. Hayes, Ph.D.
The War Of Art (Steven Pressfield) – It is a book that demonstrates and articulates the idea of bringing something meaningful into the world. Reading the book helps people to understand the value of fighting the battle of working on things. The concept of the book talks about the ways of handling procrastination so individuals can bring their craft in reality. Since people are more into finding ways on how to start doing things, they often forget to work on staying on what they are doing. The book enables a better understanding of what needs to get done. “Delay and procrastination are not the same things,” Timothy A. Pychyl, PhD, says. “Let’s not confuse deliberate, thoughtful delay of action with the lack of self-regulatory ability known as procrastination.”
Thinking Fast And Slow (Daniel Kahneman) – It is one of the densest books on the list because of detailed knowledge of biases and heuristics. It has something to do with people’s mental ability to take and make decisions that sometimes lead to faulty thinking. The concept of the book is to help someone in stepping back before making any life-changing move. The idea is to build a concrete road to a targeted goal. But one the best effect of the book is the boosting of someone’s interest in general knowledge. Since the book tackles a lot of different topics, there is an enabler of growth in the mind’s bank of knowledge.
The Dip (Seth Godin) – Set Godin is a fantastic writer who writes a variety of well-known books. But The Dip is one of his most famous creations. It is written short and is very digestible. The book does not only talk about the right attitude into achieving success but also emphasizes on the traits that hinder it. The concept of the book focuses more on boosting people’s mental strength every time they enter a place where they find things a little to worse difficult. “A person with mental toughness faces challenges directly and is effective in solving them. I believe that someone who’s mentally tough has a combination of willpower, skill and resilience,” writes Gary Seeman, Ph.D.
For most people, it might take a while to absorb the lessons of these books. However, the incorporation of some of the ideas from the books can help in people’s significant value of change.
“[B]ooks are an invaluable but underutilized resource that can increase empathy, enhance recovery and inspire those with mental health difficulties,” wrote Rob Whitley, PhD. “As such, reading should be encouraged for everybody, but particularly those with mental illness—whether through formal bibliotherapy groups or individual prompting from family, friends or clinicians.”
This includes not only fiction books but also inspirational and self-help books. “Self-improvement books now account for at least a $2.5 billion a year industry in the U.S. alone, increasing since 1972 to at least 2.5% of the total number of books in print,” wrote Susan Krauss Whitbourne, PhD. However, she reminds us, “Getting the wrong self-help book can actually set you back in your search for answers to the dilemmas facing you in your life right now.”
For a start, I will not be going to say that these books I am going to share with you are the best in the world. Some may agree that these books are not that well-written or engaging at some point. However, they are the ones that share at least one idea, and that is to change someone’s trajectory life for the better.
The Motivation Hacker (Nick Winter) – It is probably the book on the list that is the least well-known. However, it is a book that can significantly create a significant impact on someone’s life. One of the main concepts that an individual can get from this book is the spiraling idea of success. It contains the fundamental truths about building the right mindful habits. It includes staring something small before doing something big. It is excellent for those individuals who can’t seem to understand why they always fail every time they set up a goal. The book emphasizes on starting a goal that can be tracked and does not demand any absolute perfection in one attempt.
The 4-Hour Workweek (Tim Ferris) – It is the book that targets someone’s professional life more than anything. The concept talks about the proper way of building a system that enables profit for the business. That is especially even if the individual is not entirely putting too much effort into handling a business. Honestly, the idea of the book is not as straightforward as it might seem. Some may agree that it is even more complicated at some point. However, the whole concept can help someone in changing his professional life. Not only on the way he wanted but also on the way he is supposed to do.
The Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People (Stephen Covey) – It is probably the most well-known book that targets personal development. It proves to create a significant impact on someone’s life due to its excellent and straightforward concept. That is to “seek to understand, and then get understood.” You see, a lot of people are having problems in listening. There is always this eagerness to respond rather than trying to understand a subject. So when both people are in the same state, no one entirely understands each other. The book’s concept is trying to create an evaluation so that real communication can happen.
The Happiness Equation (Neil Pasricha) – It is a book that explains a lot about happiness consistently on a day-to-day basis. However, the totality of its idea stays focus on one particular subject, and that is retirement. It is where someone focuses on relaxation after years of hard work. The concept of retirement was once for aged people who will become the state’s responsibility. However, in the recent generation, it already became a goal in life. The book explains that the whole idea of just stopping at a particular age is not human nature. That is because humans are born to progress. So when they stop doing something, it means a waste of time.
According to Marty Nemko, PhD, “It’s not surprising that a well-chosen book would aid self-improvement in the general population. But meta-analyses also report bibliotherapy’s effectiveness in helping teens with mild depression or anxiety, as do individual studies of mild depression with young adults, and of mild to moderate depression in older adults.”
So if you already like these books, then you should get a copy of each. Also, check out the rest of the list on the second part of this article.
Whether they’re long or short, books are a way of inspiring and awakening the mind and spirit. They can serve as a porthole to another world through one’s imaginations. And as much as our parents, doctors, and therapists can help us learn how to deal with life when we are adults, books are children’s key to discovering some of the most valuable lessons about the value of family, of love, and life. According to child psychologist Bruno Bettelheim, Ph.D, a good children’s book must “promote [the child’s] ability to find meaning in life…It must stimulate his imagination; help him to develop his intellect and to clarify his emotions; be attuned to his anxieties and aspirations; give full recognition to his difficulties, while at the same time suggesting solutions to the problems which perturb him.” These books are not only limited to the fantasy or magical theme but include other genres as long as they tell a story, and they evoke feeling and inspiration. “In books, a child can find others who think like he does, or who cope with challenges he thinks are unique to him (like being deaf, or dealing with mental illness or loss),” says Dona Matthews, Ph.D. “This can be a catalyst for him feeling okay about himself, and discovering the strength in his own unique way of being.”
Below is a list of our best books for kids and children that instill valuable lessons to people of all ages.
Andrew Matthews is an award-winning author about personal development and also a motivational speaker that advocates about the importance of happiness. Psychologists, upon reading his book, also agree to what Andrew Matthews had to convey.
Mental illness, such as anxiety and depression, is a damaging condition that works in silence. It is too difficult at some point to recognize its symptoms because not everyone shares the same experience and level of dysfunction. There are people with anxiety and depression who perfectly look okay. Then there are the ones who struggle too much that it becomes hard not to notice. If this circumstance brings confusion, there are easy ways you can understand it better. One way is through reading. A lot of books out there can become beneficial in providing you with the different information you might need for future reference. In this article, I will enumerate some of the most helpful books you might want to consider checking out.
Speak is a written novel by Laurie Halse Anderson. Its story revolves around in its protagonist named Melinda. She’s an alienated girl who usually isolates herself from the crowd. The topic of rape surrounds the book itself. It is what causes clinical depression and general anxiety to the main character. The book talks more about sensitive issues, secrecy, as well as family and relationship problems. There’s a significant chance that you can get caught up in the story because it will make you feel that no one is safe from experiencing an unfortunate thing such as rape. But even though that’s the case, you’ll be able to end up thanking yourself for not giving up to your psychological condition. The book will make you realize that you are not alone in any battle. That whatever it is you are going through, there is always someone out there that struggles with you during the same time.
Thirteen Reasons Why (2007)
Jay Asher is the author of the most sought after novel entitled “Thirteen Reasons Why,” If you think why the title seems familiar, that’s because it is now a running series on Netflix. In the book, the story typically focuses on depression due to bullying and betrayal. It becomes a serious matter because the stress, anxiety, and pressure, eventually led to the victim’s suicide. The girl then sends out 13 recorded tapes specifically for 13 persons. The book depicts the reality of how a series of torments can psychologically and emotional damage someone without others noticing it. In some instances, this book can directly relate to most teenage depression. The primary lesson in this written masterpiece is that whatever things come your way, suicide shouldn’t have to be an option. It doesn’t resolve and change anything. With suicide, only the one who committed it loses the emotional and mental battle.
“13 Reasons Why has opened the door for families and communities to discuss life as a teenager in the 21st century. Specifically, the kinds of social pressures that occur for some children and teens — the micro-aggressions found in hallways, school buses, lunch rooms, online, and otherwise, as well as the traumatic issues of bullying, social injustice, sexual assault, and suicide,” writes Deborah Serani, Psy.D.
Perks Of Being A Wallflower (1999)
If you’re also familiar with the title, yes, that’s Emma Watson’s movie from a best-selling novel by Stephen Chbosky. It follows a high school kid named Charlie that struggles in fitting in his freshman year on his new school. He’s an introvert individual that suffers from depression and anxiety. The book represents a significant outlet for those teenagers who can’t seem to acknowledge their emotional and mental needs. That even though they already know their condition, they still get blinded by the idea of it not causing a big of a deal. The book depicts mental state as a usual thing that happens to everyone. It focuses on those individuals who don’t pay attention to their feelings where they become trapped in a self-build room of isolation.
“I would argue that stories like the one told in The Perks of Being a Wallflower can help young people work out their own stories,” writes Skip Dine Young, Ph.D.
It’s Kind Of A Funny Story (2006)
Ned Vizzini, the author of the novel, wrote the “somewhat” mature masterpiece from a personal battle of depression. It speaks with mental illness where the symptoms become severe that author also ends up killing himself. The book is a representation of teenage life where there’s a struggle with peer and family pressure, relationship issues, sexual desires, and even drugs and substance abuse. The whole focus of the story depicts the reality of how a teenager thinks, responds, and handles his issues and desires without considering the consequences. Craig, the character in the novel is an utter illustration of jealousy, failure, agitation, exhaustion, and irrationality. All of these traits contribute to the adherence of depression.
“It’s very hard to have a son or daughter who is going through depression, and parents desperately want to help them,” psychologist Timothy J. Strauman, PhD, says. “You can’t take their depression away. You can make sure they are getting good treatment and be patient with it.”
These are just some of the best-selling books you might want to consider reading. Don’t hesitate to check out more if you wish to.
One of the common problems that authors face is experiencing a writer’s block. Sometimes, no matter how much one wanted to come up with a beautiful piece, he just can’t. If this continues to happen in the long run, it is possible for the writer to suffer from stress and anxiety. If you do not want the same thing to happen to you, it is crucial for you to continue looking for inspiration. As long as you have one, it will be easier on your part to keep going.
At this point, it is vital or crucial to point out the reality that a lot of things may cause anxiety in your life as an author. Because of this, you have to master the different ways on how to deal with anxiety. The goal is to eliminate it in your life. The process may be complicated, but everything is going to be worth it in the end. Below are some of the tips to follow if you want to handle anxiety smarter:
Change Your Mindset
Let go of negative thoughts and emotions. Instead, welcome a life that is full of positivity. You have to convince yourself that everything in your life is going to get better so that you can eliminate the anxious thoughts. The change is not going to be an easy thing to do. However, with the right attitude and dedication, you can achieve it. Learn how to focus on the great things and experiences that you have instead of the bad ones.
Stop pressuring yourself into becoming perfect. Take note that no matter what you do, you will not reach a certain point of absolute perfection. “When we believe that our mistakes reflect poorly on us, and when we feel that other people are constantly judging us for those mistakes or difficulties, it can create a lot of anxiety,” wrote Elizabeth Cush, MA, LCPC. She added, “You can be your own worst enemy because the perception that you need to be perfect all the time or people will criticize you often sets off a firestorm of critical self-talk.”
Remember that there will always be an extra room for error and mistake, and it is completely okay. What you have to do is to accept these imperfections so that no one can use it against you.
Keep Yourself Busy
When you are stressed about something, it is ideal if you will keep on moving. “Taking action by doing something, almost anything, will help you work through your anxiety,” wrote Barton Goldsmith, PhD, LMFT. Find time to do certain activities that are within your range of interests. Dr. Goldsmith added, “Do what works best for you at the moment and don’t worry about breaking your normal routine, that change may actually help reduce your anxiety.”
The objective is to look for ways to keep yourself busy. The purpose of this is to ensure that you will be pre-occupied for other things that honestly matter. When you are busy, you will not have the luxury of time to worry about certain things.
Connect With Other Writers
Writers usually share the same dilemmas and problems, especially when it comes to their career in the professional world. If you are already losing focus on your goals as an author, maybe all you have to do is to search for other writers who can help you see a different perspective. Find the right set of individuals who may inspire you to continue your passion for writing. Having the right support group can be a big help on your part.
Escape For A While
Do not be afraid to run away to a different city or country. Sometimes, all you have to do is to travel and explore a brand new place. Emerging in a new community and seeing new stuff can make you feel better about your life. You will feel excitement and admiration about your professional career. As such, you must find time to do this. A perfect escape is one that you do with the person you love.
Log Off Online
Often, all that you may need is to log out from your social media accounts and avoid using it for a certain period. The decision depends on your taste and preference. Take note that being available online can take a toll in your writing style and inspiration.
Ellen Hendriksen, PhD, a clinical psychologist at Boston University’s Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders noted, “You’d think that taking away uncertainty would make us less anxious. But instead, because technology has lessened our experience handling uncertainty, we’re less prepared to deal with ambiguity when it arises.” Because of this, it is highly encouraged to leave your online mark for a little while and focus on things that matter.
Anxiety and stress are only normal in the life of a writer. Because of this, you must focus on eliminating the said negative mental health conditions by following the tips mentioned above. Your success will not happen overnight, but if you are consistent in doing the right things, everything will be all right. Feel free to contact or get in touch with a therapist or counselor if you believe your mental state is not in good shape.